This was one of those Thor comics I was warned about. It’s not because Journey into Mystery #94 features Loki as the main villain again,although my enjoyment of his character is waning with this being his fifth turn as the main villain in only nine issues.
No,the reason this comic was one I was warned about is because it’s just meh. The premise is simple:Loki turns Thor evil,but the way he goes about it is groan-worthy and the resolution is so quick,it’s easy to miss. Oh,and if you don’t remember this issue? It’s because Odin didn’t want you to.
The story opens with a nuclear missile test going awry and the government taking the only option left to them,calling their buddy Thor to patch things up. Despite the fact that Thor has aided the military in earlier tests,they don’t have his number and a worldwide alert is sent out. Lucky for the world,Donald Blake just happens to be listening to the radio (and its Jane’s day off) so the world will never have to know just how close it came to destruction.
Thor hilariously picks up the phone and calls the number on the broadcast (along with a few hundred thousand others,no doubt) before flying off to deal with the “little problem”. That’s when Loki reveals himself. The Asgardians really aren’t too bright when it comes too Loki. He’s chained to a wall again and he’s manipulating things from a distance again.
Turns out,Loki took control of the missile to create a situation where Thor would have to throw his hammer. Really,Loki? I mean,I know you like to go big,but Thor will throw his hammer at just about anything…
Anyway,Thor throws his hammer to destroy the missile (safely,surely) and then,as it returns to him… Loki creates a distraction for Thor at the last moment and the hammer strikes him on the back of the head.
Now,see,I was thinking Loki was a maniacal villain. Surely,it didn’t take centuries for him to come up with the old “hitting Thor in the head with his own hamer” trick. Heck,he’s the God of Mischief – he should be doing this every single time Thor throws the damn thing. But maybe something was different,maybe this time Loki planned to get Thor to turn his head just right… so it would hit Thor’s chromosomatic gland.
You know the chromosomatic gland,right? The gland that controls your personality? Yep,that one! When struck,it changes your personality to the opposite! Can you say Evil Thor?
Evil Thor goes to free Loki,tells off his Dad,and comes to wreak havoc on earth until Odin gives them control of Asgard. Thor destroys the Great Wall,Taj Mahal,Eiffel Tower,the Pyramids,the Golden Gate Bridge,the leaning Tower of Pisa,and fills in the Panama Canal. And that was just Thor. Loki makes the Sphinx walk around and destroy Cairo,dumps the Empire State Building in the Hudson,and reanimates dinosaurs.
Fortunately,some UN ambassadors appear and agree to call up Odin and plead with him to surrender Asgard to the duo. Now it’s important to note where we are in the story at this point,the next to last page.
Simply put,that’s not good.
In quick succession,the UN ambassadors reveal themselves as Asgardians and plunk Thor on the back of the head with the hammer again and right him with the universe.
Before Loki can escape Thor hits him on the back of the head with the hammer. You might expect Loki to become good,but it turns out Thor isn’t as precise up-close as Loki was realms away (thanks for nothing,medical school). Thor merely knocks Loki unconscious.
With only two panels to go,Thor walks into the General Assembly of the UN,apologizes,to the “world”and promises to repair all the damage,but it’s moot. Odin erases the memories of everyone on Earth in relation to the incident. Makes you wonder how many times this has happened,huh?
I won’t say this issue was awful,because I did laugh a few times (there’s always going to be unintentional hilarity when Thor gets hit on the back of the head with his own hammer) and all the havoc caused by Thor &Loki provided some interest even though it was too quickly wrapped up,but this really wasn’t a good issue. This is a plot worthy of a bad Saturday morning cartoon at best. Hopefully,there won’t be too many more like this in my future.
As we close,here’s a bigger look at the cover of #94 along with two selected panels.